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Monday, 15 June 2009

While we're on the subject of metal...the greatest band ever?

Steel Panther. Remember it well.

I first saw their name on a massive poster at Download this weekend and laughed out loud at the strapline across the top of it that read "Steel Panther: We Fucked Your Mom In The 80s". I noticed they were playing at Download but didn't think I could catch them live, a decision I'm now enormously regretting.

So I've just done some internet 'research' (if you can call it that) and I still can't tell if they're an out-and-out comedy band or if they're just a very funny band who are doing their innuendo-laden glam metal to perfection.

Their single's called Death To All But Metal. Sample lyric:
"Fuck The Goo Goo Dolls, they can suck my balls,
They look like the dorks that hang out at the malls
Eminem can suck it, so can Dr. Dre,
They can suck each other just because they're gay
"Death to Britney Spears, kill the little slut,
Kill Madonna too, and then fuck her in the butt

It really is wonderful stuff. Some of their tracks (I launched straight in with an iTunes shopping spree) don't need lyrics to explain them - Asian Hookers, Eatin' Ain't Cheatin' and my personal favourite, I Want Your Tits. I've got Asian Hooker on in the background and if my ears aren't deceiving me, I believe the chorus includes the couplet "suckey fuckey, suckey fuckey / smells like sushi". Stunning.

The album's only £5.99 on iTunes so I'd recommend a little light relief and getting it now. Here's a clip of them backstage which suggests they're a full blown comedy project, but that doesn't put me off. Oh god, their 'ballad' has just come on, with the line "if suddenly you were a guy, I'd be suddenly gay". And the chorus is "my heart belongs to you but my cock is community property / you're the only girl I like to screw when I'm not on the road". Touching stuff.

Check out the video for Death To All But Metal - I think you'll like it.

Not only is Sarah Silverman in the video, they've apparently had everyone from Kenny Loggins to Dennis Rodman, Pink to Billy Ray Cyrus, Jeremy Piven to Kelly Clarkson, Paul Stanley to Lil Jon join them onstage.

I think I'm a convert.

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